Soooo.....

I got an early V-day shout-out on weds.

Was i surprised? Yes and no. Yes because it was weds and no because of the sender.

And yes it was from the ex. Oh boy. Here it goes.

No i haven't been blogging about him. I've been keeping that info to myself. I have been confiding in a few friends about what has been going on since we broke up. But never was compelled to blog about it. Why? I really don't know.

Slow deep breaths.

Yes we still talk on the phone and text each other quite a bit. His cell phone bill was pretty high most recently --in part- because of the texting.

Yes i have seen him.

Yes i have slept with him.

ALOT.

And it was exactly like i thought it would be and exactly how i wanted it.


But now, it just seems like it's time to end all that and just let what will be be. It's getting old. Old because it's not how i want things. I sent him a text the other day that point blank said either we gon do this as a couple, figure this shit out or we just gon leave it alone. Dick can be found and rode anywhere. U are not the last man on earth basically.


And in true men fashion, when posed with that all-important question--he didn't respond. Ha! Maybe his cell was cut off from the high bill right? I'm joking....


And hell yes it's hard to say goodbye but if i can't have what i want the way i want it, why keep losing this race?


I mean even one of the presidential nominees has to concede and declare themselves the loser eventually right? They don't want to but they know ain't no way they can win. They give their concession speech, exit stage left and go home.

Maybe it's time for me to do the same. No more calls. No more texts. No more sex. Nothing. He can live his life the way he is so itching to live it without the interference that is me.

And i can live mine. I have fought for this relationship long enough. And if it ain't been worked out by now, it ain't gon be worked out. I can only compromise so much of myself and my pride. For what? My momma didn't raise a quitter. But she did teach me how to fight the good fight and how to win. Most southern women are born with that gumption. And since she is from Pascagoula, Mississippi she has a ton of gumption!!

Now it's time to just get back to being me.

We really don't have to be friends either. I have enough. Maybe somewhere down the line we can be friends but for right now distance is probably what's best.

He's a great guy. Just great for himself. Or someone else not named me.

Maybe i was the starter girlfriend! U know--the one you test everything out on, break-up with , then get with someone else and say that's real love!! Great! I love it!! lol !

But anywho--i'm going to try and enjoy my newfound singleness. (is that even a word?) ding!

Just sit back, relax and enjoy my new place. ( I pick up my keys on 2/15!!)

Have drinks with my friends.

Take the 3 trips i have planned for this year.

And party like it's 1999 on my birthday!!
disclaimer: pictures may or may not be displayed depending on how intoxicated or goofy i may appear.

All i'm saying is that i can let this break-up defeat me or define me. And because i still have so many more plans for my life, I WILL DEFINE ME.